u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
is it fun? or sober?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize
