She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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