I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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