...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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