does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
