There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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