I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
She is in my trunk
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
