you will always have a special place in my vag
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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