i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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