that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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