Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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