I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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