I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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