your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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