Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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