I just gift wrapped bread.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
You ate ashes out of my bong
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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