I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
