Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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