I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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