Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
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