Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
