Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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