Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Randomize
