I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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