a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize