Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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