This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Randomize
