The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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