More tranny stories later!
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
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