Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Randomize
