His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
