No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
either way he was missing a nipple.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
