Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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