who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
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Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
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You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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