Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
