ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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