I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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