I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL