did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
