you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize
