I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Please, let me fuck your mom
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
