I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
