This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
