I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize
