pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
