So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
