Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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