Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Randomize
