I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
