Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
