why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Randomize
